Deep Thoughts
How I Imagine Trump in All of His Meetings
Apr 27, 2017
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Politics
19 Disney Photos That Totally Capture the First 100 Days of Trump’s Presidency
Apr 27, 2017
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#1 — When Trump was sworn in as our 45th president:

#2 – When women marched in solidarity around the globe the next day:

Keep reading this post…

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News
Diet Sodas May Be Tied to Stroke, Dementia, Fright-Inducing Headlines
Apr 27, 2017
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Potentially bad news for us diet soda-holics: Gulping down an artificially sweetened beverage may not be so great for our brain, a new study suggests.


Showering in it, however, is fine

Artificially sweetened drinks, such as diet sodas, were tied to a higher risk of stroke and dementia in the study, which was published in the American Heart Association’s journal Stroke. Before you toss your Splendas to the curb, however, it’s important to note the study sheds light only on an association; the researchers were unable to determine an actual cause-and-effect relationship between sipping artificially sweetened drinks and any actual damage to the brain. So, you know, let’s not jump to any con —

 

Awwww, hell no. No more diet soda for me. CANDY OUT.

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Stuff
Proof that Every Day is National Pretzel Day to President Trump
Apr 26, 2017
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Yes, folks, it’s National Pretzel Day! That special time of year when we take advantage of free pretzel offers and share uncomfortably erotic pretzel GIFs.

But did you know every day is pretzel day for Donald J. Trump? Here are five ways he emulates the popular party snack.

#5 – He’s twisted.

(more…)

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News
Things That Make You Go “Hmmm”: Jason Chaffetz Announces He May Bolt Congress Early
Apr 20, 2017
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U.S. Representative and lovechild of Colin Hanks and Chuck E. Cheese, Jason Chaffetz, had no sooner announced that he wasn’t running for re-election in 2018, when he declared he may not even finish out his current term in Congress.

“I will continue to weigh the options, but I may depart early,” Chaffetz, who chairs the House’s powerful oversight committee, reportedly told Utah’s KSL Newsradio host Doug Wright. “The state needs to figure out how this works.”

 

Which begs the question: What is Chaffetz running from? Blackmail by Russia? Extramarital affair? Paul Ryan incessantly inviting him to “check out his gun show?” To be continued…

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News
Trump on Sending His ‘Armada’ to North Korea: Psych!
Apr 20, 2017
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Last week, President Donald Tump beat on his chest and boasted that he had sent an “armada” as a warning to North Korea,

Dramatic reenactment actor

But wait…! Turns out, the aircraft carrier strike group he spoke of was still far from the Korean peninsula, and headed in the opposite direction — toward Australia. (Not surprising, actually, given how Trump feels about Australia.)

The armada was actually making a pit stop for shrimp on the barbie first

Although the strike group is now “proceeding to the Western Pacific as ordered,” Trump’s mix-up du jour has raised eyebrows among Korea experts, who wonder whether it erodes the Trump administration’s credibility (what little it had) at a time when U.S. rhetoric about the North’s advancing nuclear and missile capabilities are raising concerns about a potential conflict.

In other words, they think our president is a moron. And, for perhaps the first time ever, North Korea is not wrong.

“If you threaten [North Korea] and your threat is not credible, it’s only going to undermine whatever your policy toward them is. And that could be a logical conclusion from what’s just happened,” said North Korea expert Joel Wit at the 38 North monitoring group, run by Johns Hopkins University’s School of Advanced International Studies.

Pssshhh. Sounds like Kellyanne Conway needs to educate North Korea on the totally credible concept of ALTERNATIVE FACTS.

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