Author archive: Candy

The Merchant of Trump Tower
Eric Trump: “Democrats Aren’t Even People”
Jun 7, 2017
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Eric Trump, who looks like the kind of guy who’d slip a date rape drug in Kelly Taylor’s punch on 90210, today cried to FOX News that Democrats criticizing his dad are, like, “not even people,” adding that “morality is just gone.” Because if anybody is the judge of morality, it’s the guy who kills exotic […]
Very Important Chart
Scientific Analysis of How President Trump Spends His Time
Jun 6, 2017
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Very Presidential
President Trump Releases Official Statement on London Terror Attack
Jun 5, 2017
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Meme
Every. Single. Morning.
Jun 1, 2017
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Covfefe
A Few Thoughts on “Covfefe”
May 30, 2017
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After you do a line of covfefe: When you formally introduce covfefe to the world: That time your wife rejected your covfefe:
News in Pictures
The News in Pictures: The President on Memorial Day
May 29, 2017
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A touching look at Trump driving the 25 yards from the stands to the site of the wreath at Arlington National Cemetery today.
News
Trump to Spicer: No Pope for You!
May 25, 2017
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Well, the unimaginable has happened: Trump has even managed to make me feel sorry for Sean Spicer. Poor Spicey. He stands in front of the press day after day, defending Trump’s wackadoodle conspiracy theories and 3AM Tweets and likely illegals acts, and how does Trump repay him? By denying him the chance to meet the pope. […]
Very Presidential
President Trump Delights Fellow NATO Leaders with His Usual Charm and Grace
May 25, 2017
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During a meeting with fellow NATO leaders in Brussels on Thursday, President Donald Trump made sure he was front and center for photographers by pushing aside Prime Minister Milo Dukanovic of Montenegro. Thanks to lip-reading skills that I acquired when I lived in a New York apartment next to a hot-dog cart storage garage that doubled […]